perfection

i distinctly remember being a child and regularly watching “true life: i want the perfect body.” i was fascinated with anything i could find on television that centered around people working toward the perfect body, whether on their own or with cosmetic surgery. i would create long lists of surgeries that i wanted to someday […]

living with anxiety

living with anxiety is fucking difficult. i often describe it as trying to complete a puzzle but you can’t find the corners and none of the pieces are lining up. the feeling that you’ve done something wrong and someone is going to be upset with you, when you really haven’t done anything at all. alienating […]

to my former best friend

it has always been difficult for me to admit when i’m upset about something. it has been even more difficult when the matter at hand is losing a friend. i like to pretend that the feelings don’t exist or that i’ve never been happier without the person in my life, even though it’s the furthest […]

thankful

i had an anxiety attack today. a full blown, completely overwhelming anxiety attack. my thoughts and emotions felt heightened. my chest was heavy and i had to take continuous deep breaths that didn’t really seem to alleviate anything. everything seemed to agitate me and i was completely on edge. i was scared, and felt like […]

somebody that i used to know

most of my ideas for writing come when i’m going for a run in the morning, generally inspired by a song that may come on. a certain song came on a few days ago and i found myself replaying it 5 times, focused more on the lyrics than my breathing, and i started to brainstorm […]